philippians four

four through seven

do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

ten through thirteen

i rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. i am not saying this because i am in need, for i have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. i know what it is to be in need, and i know what it is to have plenty, i have learned the secret of being content in any and ever situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. i can do everything through him who gives me strength.

proverbs four twenty three

above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

here we go.

so school is in it's third week and i am stressed.

three studios was an awesome idea.

not.

but i guess it isn't that bad.

i have to finish building my parents

by tomorrow for ceramics.

finish sewing and dyeing my fabric by thursday at nine in the morning.

and do a quick painting by thursday at one.

three forty five on thursday cannot come soon enough.

this weekend i will be enjoying some beck, spoon, and mgmt.

i am also contemplating buying an ipod.

mine is worthless. 

and i will be buying it with my own money.

it is on sale. woo.

dentist appointment on monday. so that means i will be skipping class.

also i have to find something that can be taken apart into five pieces and

be at least a foot in one direction or in some measurement.

praise the Lord i don't have anything that needs to be done for my art history class.

also i need to get going on this continual collage thing.

and i need to figure out how not to be messy and get paint everywhere.

i need just wear the same clothes to paint in so only those ones get messy.

i have paint on my face.

how in the world??

oh i am going to mexico on a missions trip next weekend.

i am nervous and excited! eek!

even though i am stressed and have many things to do. 

it is the little things that get me through all of it.

two days in a row you have called me beautiful... 

why? really? 

i feel like weird.

never beautiful.

whenever larry complimented me it was hot. 

or something not like that.

i can't believe you.

are you.

hello.

so this semester started.

i am fully enjoying all of my classes

and already procrastinating.

what else is new?

i have not heard from you.

i heard you sent a postcard to stephanie.

i'm glad we are friends too.

i feel some what odd.

people have people.

i cannot think like this.

fiber and painting tomorrow. 

i really want to start this collage but i don't feel motivated to spread it out on the floor and work on it.

sometimes i wish i was here alone. 

hmmm. maybe i will stop procrastinating.

and work on it now.

i'm really excited about my ceramics project,

but i feel like i am not going to be able to make it the way i want to.

this is what i feel with all projects i work on.

i miss you as a friend.

and i cannot let the other become

too close.

because it is not healthy.

i am at a cross road.

the way you think about her.

i feel is definitely not the way you think about me.

why would you say these things to me?

you are confusing me. way more than others have in the past.

anyway i give all of this up to You.

the one who truly matters.

i can wait. i promise.

please be here for me when i am in these moments.

i know You will be here.

what am i saying?